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Paternal Vagina Policing
Finding a path to empathetic parenting is imperative
The innanets have been abuzz with discussion over TI’s recent statement that he has accompanied his now 18 year-old daughter to all of her gynecological exams to ensure that her hymen in still in tact.
I must pause here to gather my thoughts and feelings…
There is much to say about how this form of parenting treats a young woman’s body like property, very similarly to how historical laws surrounding the contract of marriage dehumanize the bride. In the era of the #MeTooMovement, this act also denies a daughter agency over her own decisions about intimacy, sexuality and the performance of such.
Yet, what has disturbed me most about this public discourse are the men who see absolutely nothing wrong with what TI has confessed to doing, and the women who approve of his actions as necessary in our morally-lacking, oversexualized world.
PARENTING. It’s what’s on the menu.
So before you get sweaty high-fiving and co-signing this mild form of child abuse, allow me to provide some personal perspective from a daughter who experienced the same embarrassing exploitation.
. . . . .
In hindsight, I can admit it was pretty stupid thing to do. The boy I was dating at the time convinced…
