Motherhood (Is)Was Not For Me

I’m still too busy nurturing my inner child

Now hear this, for the well-meaning general population who asks and for any family members who have been holding out hope that I may one day change my mind: I ain’t birthin’ no babies!

Whew! Glad to get that out in plain terms right here at the top.

For those of you who think such a declaration is completely absurd and unnecessary, perhaps you haven’t been cornered by your sisters at a holiday gathering. Sometime after the main meal, but before dessert, at Christmas dinner in my late 20s, I was pulled aside and interrogated about why I was waiting so long to get my ovaries working. Husbands come and go, they advised, but the joys of motherhood are on a limited timeframe and I should be aware of that fact. If professional concerns were an issue, they even offered to do some long-term babysitting for me while I was out on tour performing (as was my trajectory at the time).

Basically, according to them, I had no excuse for not starting a family because I had support and resources.

But dammit…what if I just don’t want to??

I don’t think many people understand how devastated I was when I lost my mother at age 11. Fuck cancer! That thief stole my biggest cheerleader and inspiration from me before she reached her 40th birthday…